Nagpapalibre si Inday sa Among Nagbirthday

21 10 2007

Whoooaaa…. Inday… Kahit sino magno-nosebleed dito sayo… 

Inday: At last, thy day has cometh, fair ruler and damsel of this luxurious abode… It is with immense admiration and pleasure that I bequeath upon thee my birthday compliments… But where, oh where, would thy banquet take place, my dear queen? Surely, thou shall engage in merriment. For each year in bounty, our empress must bestow upon her mere chambermaids a fraction of the bounty and graces she hath received… Would thy be kind enough to let us partake in our royal majesty’s ball? The mead and ale to complement the honeysuckled roast loin and courtyard jesters are earthly temporalities we’re looking forward to. Unquestionably we’d be most charmed and delighted…

Amo: (Lumabas ang dugo sa lahat ng butas ng mukha)





Inday madness…

20 10 2007

Well, me and some of my friends are taking time to read and laugh at this funny, sosyalerang household maid named “Inday“.

Who is Inday? Inday is a house-helper who is very smart (smarter than her employer). She is a fictional character, who is now at the heart of text jokes in the Philippines. According to Inquirer, “Whether in e-mail, blog posts, Internet chats or text messages, she’s smart, spouts flowery English (even a little Spanish) — and is keeping Filipinos here and abroad in stitches.”

Here’s one of her spectacular lines:

Reaction sa palengke vendor nang malamang kulang ng 2 guhit ang nabiling tilapia
“How dare you insulate that I could tolerate such a diabolical insult from a crap of humanity such as you! I would rather be deceived than to talk with you! You haven’t heard the last of me yet you scoundrel, you nincompoop! You fiendish creature!”

When Inday goes to the public market:
Attached herewith is a list of proposed acquisition in line with my proposal to procure and purchase your household essentials. I have already made initial survey of current market prices. Note however that prices could vary depending on the prevailing exchange rate and aggregate supply and demand which I also monitor in ANC on a regular basis.

Bathroom blues.
Alas, the springs of life are everything but flowing. My quest for my own freedom was futile. For now, I’m forcefully bound to manacles of my dismaying impurities. Sadly, it haunts me. I am a prisoner of my own.

Walang tubig at hindi makaligo si Inday. So, nagdradrama siya.

Wala ng Bagyo
I’m already in the spirits of radiant luminosity, my beloved friend. Such tender coolness, yet conveying a pleasurable warmth. A placid humid waft fills this otherwise musty suite and kisses my body from head to toe. My arms and face are lavishly smothered with a thousand caresses… Oh, how sweet the sensation lingers.Exult with me, my dear comrade, my darling sweetheart! The gloom and wretched darkness is gone. The horrific skirmish cries of the strident booming thunders have ceased! The ominous inundation of heavenly moans have come to an end. The slashes of cloud-piercing lighting have been banished from this realm to invade the moonlit skies another day! Hallelujah…– Ganyan magsabi si Inday sa kaibigan at minamahal na si Dodong na: “May kuryente na, may ilaw na, may aircon na din! (Sosyal) Wala na bagyo! Woohoo!”

Inquirer
The Chronicles of Ardee